Can we really develop our soft skills thanks to neuroscience?

In February 2021, Simon Sinek (lecturer and author of books on management and motivation) shared on his YouTube channel that Soft Skills are first and foremost Human Skills and therefore absolutely fundamental. He took exception to the fact that they are contrasted with Hard Skills. This is an essential point of view that deserves to be explored.

He argues that difficult conversations, effective confrontation, listening, empathy and patience are among the "people" skills that need to be developed along with management, financial, IT, marketing or governance skills. He adds that organizations often overlook their best managers, not valuing these crucial interpersonal qualities, including the ability to inspire trust. And as a result, the company's leadership suffers.

Neuroscience offers an absolutely proactive and cutting-edge approach to exploring the notion of knowing how to be, by knowing more about the brain, the nervous system and the body in order to demystify the logic behind human behavior, or how to better understand myself and my interactions with others. This offers a real navigation map, very useful for rational and logical people who are sometimes mystified by the "inexplicable" (according to them) behaviors of others.

Note: neuroscience is one of the six disciplines related to cognitive science (along with psychology, linguistics, anthropology, artificial intelligence, philosophy).

Is self-awareness innate?

The first reflex when we talk about self-management is to take for granted that it depends on our deep nature, our personality and this, without possibility of improvement.

Good news! It is quite possible to develop it, like any other skill.

Indeed, the "gift" plays a minimal role here: talented individuals, who perfectly master a skill or a know-how, are above all people surrounded by people who support them, who train them, who encourage them and who inspire them (to caricature, if someone spends all the time telling you that you are great... you will end up being convinced).

How do you make it better?

Without going so far as to say that you just have to want it to be able to do it - that would be a simplistic and misleading vision - studies show that our brain can continue to learn, regardless of our age (neuroplasticity). The knowledge of how to be is no exception.

It is not our initial level (the famous innate talent) or our original predisposition that will allow us to succeed, but rather elements such as

• Our potential to increase our own abilities
• What we think about it, i.e. our mindset, our attitude or state of mind
• The practice to create supportive and aligned habits
• The encouragement of those around us (first your parents, then your teachers, trainers, manager or coach...).

The important thing is to adopt a state of mind that is open to learning experiences: am I ready to perform while taking pleasure in learning? Performance not as a goal but as a result... Focus on what you want to become. The one who has learning objectives, implements strategies and results in improved abilities. Hence the importance of supporting and encouraging the process and progress, however small. This is what leads to more self-confidence and perseverance.

It is the difference between "you are incompetent" and "you can improve your performance". All this hope is summarized in the approach of a scientist, Carol Dweck, who wrote a very inspiring book on this subject, entitled "Growth Mindset".

Moreover, it is difficult not to find similarities between soft skills and emotional intelligence. The latter was popularized in the 1990s by Daniel Goleman, who made known the work of psychologists Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer. Emotional intelligence is the awareness and regulation of oneself and the impact one has on others. In this sense, neuroscience can greatly help in the development of both emotional intelligence and relational or social intelligence.

What is the contribution of neuroscience in the company?

The objective is to become master of our states and to understand the logic behind our reactions, rather than to suffer them. We become aware and active in changing our state of mind in the face of perceived reality.

In everyday life and at work, this can be applied in the following ways (non-exhaustive list):

• Manage distractions (emails and other numerous notifications).
• Be aware of your cognitive biases when a new colleague joins the team (cultural, educational filters, etc.) to facilitate discovery and exchange.
• Exchange calmly when things are "shaky". When giving new responsibilities, micro-management, workload distribution, (the SCARF model, developed by David Rock, PhD and his team of researchers is useful).
• Making a difference in a meeting: by encouraging the emergence of creative ideas (insights), provided that participants are assured that even the wildest ideas are welcome and that no one will be judged (what is called "psychological safety"), in an era where diversity, equity and inclusion (DE&I) have become essential in human resources management.
• Harnessing stress as an enabler, not an inhibitor. We must not eliminate stress, but calibrate it and learn to take care of our vital energy and health.

How can they help in a context of change?

It is obvious that in times of change, know-how is important since the actors who initiate and implement the change must have the required skills and competencies. However, we must not neglect the impact of interpersonal skills. In a period of change, being able to develop and use these assets can make all the difference in the support and collaboration of teams. Indeed, it is a matter of decoding how people interact with each other, thanks to a logical and structured approach.

In conclusion
In recent years, neuroscience has evolved and is attracting worldwide interest in management and governance by offering revolutionary evidence of mechanisms that are awe-inspiring. Forward-thinking organizational leaders are curious to learn how the brain works in order to improve their effectiveness, both in personal and organizational contexts.

We can master and develop soft skills through neuroscience, and thus bring more humanity into our relationships, by having a better understanding of our nervous system and our brain. Therefore, to be in full possession of our means as often as possible during a 24-hour day: to understand in order to regain control and this, more and more rapidly.

In business life, basic notions in neuroscience become a quick and efficient tool for clarification so that we understand ourselves better and are able to manage the unexpected, thus being at our best and happy... with ourselves and others. Strangely, this is still not widespread in organizations. However, neuroscience allows us to so easily decode "what triggers us" and makes us feel good.

So why deprive ourselves? Skills that can literally revolutionize our daily lives and the expression of leadership.

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